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Pacing: How To Avoid Putting Your Readers To Sleep
by Carolyn Chambers Clark

According to Webster's, pacing is "the rate of movement or progress." Slow passages that don't move the story forward can put your readers to sleep. A well-paced novel means readers can hear you saying, "This happened, then this happened, then this happened..." Readers will be eager to find out, "What's going to happen next?" A number of factors can drag a story to a halt or never let it get going in the first place.

Slow Starts
To hook readers, use a first paragraph that makes them care. Don't start by describing a sunset (no matter how beautiful) or a town (no matter how intriguing) until you present a character that makes the reader askWhat did that poor character do to be punished that way? What is that lovable (tough, smart, etc.) protagonist going to do now? Readers want to pick up your book and read an opening that says, "Here I am and here is my story." (First person). Or, "Here is the protagonist and this is her story." (Third person).

Unnecessary Words
Good pacing doesn't mean you have to have 20 bodies and ten chases in your story to have things happen. For starters, get rid of unnecessary words that aren't doing any work.
Example: Sarah was able to open the door and sneak inside.
Analysis: "Was able" are unnecessary words. Was is also a weak verb that can start your reader yawning. Either Sarah sneaked inside or she didn't. No pussyfooting around. To move the story along, write, "Sarah opened the door and sneaked inside."
Example: For some reason, Sarah grabbed the shovel and ran inside."
Analysis: "For some reason," serves no purpose in moving the story forward. Also delete the words however, by the way, although, in the first case, there was and similar phrases. Delete them and start with the next word in the sentence or rearrange sentences so they read, "Somebody or something strong verb."

Insufficient or Unnecessary Dialogue
Dialogue brings characters into conflict (they argue with themselves or each other), reveals their character (instead of saying he was a nasty man, show him saying nasty things), provide information, move the story forward, create a sense of place or time, describe a place, or summarize what has already happened. Dialogue can be overused and that can slow pace. Avoid using dialogue to introduce characters to each other or small-talk, make long transitions, provide information that is better shown through action, or to repeat what's already been said or made clear in previous passages.

Unbalanced Proportion
Print out your story and underline story events with one color marker and additional information with another color marker. Feed the back story or background in between action and dialogue for a better balance. Look at your scenes and use another piece of paper to write the pattern you find, e.g., Event. Event. Info. Info. Event. Info. If there is too much Info and not enough Event, take out some of the info sentences.

Long Transitions
To put readers into a coma, write long transitions between story events. A good story only includes every important thing that happened, not everything that happened. A good transition is short, direct and almost invisible. Don't account for every moment or every movement. Use short and direct transitions e.g., "On Sunday morning, Jamie still daydreamed about finding her parents," or "Forty years later, they met again," or "Eight million years later, they met on Mars." For each scene, write a beginning, a development and a result. If a scene doesn't have any drama, delete it. While you're at it, delete all words, sentences, and paragraphs that don't move the story forward, and you'll be on your way to fantastic pacing!

Carolyn Chambers Clark © 2003
This article originally appeared in First Draft, Volume 8, #1, January 2003